MAKE UP

What is make up really? Chemicals mixed with water and some coloring so that we might find our perfect match? Lord help us, there a terms like undertones and dewy and mat finishes. The thing I like most about make up witch is dumb so don't judge is the level of bad ass I feel. There is something about the arch of an eyebrow or the plump lips that make me want to kick ass and take names. Without my "full face" I feel weak or vulnerable. No idea why this is but I feel better in my make up at work, maybe that's because I was told without it on I look like I have a bad attitude. Oh yeah that happened. My world kinda changed forever that day. I haven't figured out if that it is a good or bad change yet...stay tuned for that answer. When hurricane Harvey hit last year I had some make up. Then I met a friend who's whole world revolves around the beauty industry and I kinda got hooked. So much I landed a job at ULTA. Now remind you I was new to the make up world and lord have mercy that was another storm I had to go through but this one was kinda of fun. Sure make up costs but working there I got a good discount and it gave me something to learn due to me being so new to this world. You can ask my husband I might have gone off the deep end a little bit, so much I had a bag hidden from him with A LOT of things in it. I wasn't sure which way was up at this point. I had found something that both excited me and scared the crap out of me and my bank account. I know people give woman and men who wear full faces of make up crap because we don't look the same with out it on but honestly none of us should be caring what others think, yes I know its easier to type here then to listen to that and do it. Trust me I know better than most. I know people also say those who love you don't care what you look like but I want to be that wife that has her husbands eye all the time, I want him to be proud of me. I want him to want me...not saying he doesn't now but I want to be able to feel sexy the way he sees me. It's hard, we all become comfortable with each other and sure weight may come and no its not simple to lose. Maybe it is for some who can find the time to wake up early and hit the gym but like most I like my sleep a lot. Mainly I think because I don't do it well at night, I don't know maybe I am a vampire which I am totally okay with. I have tried the whole gym thing but then I feel guilty about not being home to clean or cook or even study now that I am back at school. Life is hard so wear the make up and do what makes you happy, I can't say no matter what because there are things out there that might make you happy but that are very bad for you, the world is complicated. I know that.